So, it seems ETH futures are trying to tell us something - that the market is about to tank and we're all screwed. But wait, what's this? Stakers are still clinging to their hopes and dreams like a bunch of masochistic clingers? Yeah, good luck with that. We all know that when reality hits and prices plummet, they'll be the first ones crying 'Uncle!' while the rest of us are laughing it up in our cryptocurrency-themed clown cars.