Buckle up, space enthusiasts! NASA has decided to shell out a whopping $300 million to fix the Johnson Space Center's infrastructure, because priorities. Seven companies will get to enjoy this sweet, sweet cash, and we're sure they'll do it with all the finesse of a drunken elephant on a sugar high. And don't even get us started on the deadline - September 30th, 2026? Ha! Who needs to explore the cosmos when you can renovate bathrooms?